Compassion

Hate hates to forgive. Love loves to forgive. Compassion wasn't hurt to forgive.

Hate attempts to expand its boundaries through violence. Love attempts to expand its boundaries through appeasement. Compassion doesn't expand as it has no boundaries.

Hate attempts to remove insecurity by destruction. Love attempts to remove insecurity by inclusion. Compassion is beyond insecure delusions.

Hate has mission. Love has purpose. Compassion has no agenda.

Hate sees the other as enemy. Love sees the other as friend. Compassion sees the other as self.

Hate needs love to thrive. Love needs hate to serve. Compassion needs neither.

Hate connives. Love fantasizes. Compassion witnesses.

Hate hurts. Love soothes. Compassion heals.

Hate believes in doomsday. Love believes in judgement day. Compassion is about today.

Hate experiences sadness. Love experiences joy. Compassion experiences Bliss.

Hate resides in your mind. Love resides in your heart. Compassion resides in you.

Hate is out of arrogance. Love is out of ignorance. Compassion is out of awareness.

Clarity

When we have no idea what to do in life or Whenever we are lost and confused we wish for clarity. We hope for some clue or a divine message that tell us what to do and how to do. We wish we know where it is heading or how it would end up.

Clarity is not about what next or how to go about from where you are or predicting your future but it is about being totally present and alive this very moment. 

When you are fully aware of this moment you have total understanding of the moment. When you carry this clarity moment to moment you have clarity forever. That clarity each moment transforms your life for better.

Dealing with Negative thoughts

Negative thoughts can be damning. One negative thought leads to another and by the time you realize a castle of doom is built. The dreamer fuses life into it and carries this monster 24x7. Peace of mind is forsaken but plans of how to beat the imagined demon occupies the mind. Thoughts of shame, of danger lurking, of failures and many similar thoughts make life hell. 

The world out there seem to be so happy except you. It looks like it is mocking at your miseries. It appears that you have been hand picked for persecution. You have a tiny tinge of hope somewhere deep inside secretly wishing that your worries evaporate. Self pity and self deprecation becomes your favorite hobby.

Thoughts per se are neither negative nor positive. It is simply a manifestation that has occurred in your mind. Thoughts that are not to your liking are labeled as negative and those that make you feel good are seen as positive thoughts. What is positive thought to you could be a negative thought to someone else. You are a body of desires. Each desire seeks its fulfillment. You comprehend these emotions through thoughts. One part of you wants fulfillment of those desires and another part of it - your values, your constraints etc - stops it from happening. You are not sure what needs to be done to feel content. It seem to be never ending tussle.

Dropping desire is not possible because you didn't create the desire. It just happened to you. Suppressing desire is not going to be effective in the long run. It makes you desperate and vulnerable to irreversible mistakes. Working to fulfill won't end it either. You would want more of it - like more money, more recognition. So how do one be immune to negative thoughts?

A temporary solution is to wait for the change in tide that brings momentary uplifting thoughts. You can also attempt to force exciting thoughts that seem to bring results in the short term but know it would wear you out mentally in the long run. That's how positive thinking works. It is like an emergency medication not for daily usage. 

Filling your mind with happy events of the past and promising future would temporarily disengage from the rut. You might probably be doing the opposite of what you are doing now. You might have to step out to the world, do small things that uplifts, meet happier and sensible people. These can pave the way for permanent solution but be aware they are more like breathers. The problem is in the root. 

A permanent solution would be to understand yourself. Learn to look within to know why you desire certain things, why certain thoughts come to haunt you. The coming to know the reason behind them would point the right direction for the right set of actions. Work on the source than react to the situation on the surface. It takes commitment. If you are serious you would work for a permanent solution otherwise your want to be happy is only a wishful thinking.

The ugly side of Humility

Many like the idea of being humble. They take pride in their humility. They feel so good when someone compliments them as a humble person. They want more of it. These are the people who claim they have no ego. That's probably the biggest ego drive they have. To whom does that pride belong? To whom does that humility belong? Who in that person claims absence of ego? 

They know arrogance is no good. They don't want to be empty vessels that make more noise. So they reach to the other extreme of the scale, which is being humble. Although they are easy to move with and friendly these are the people who are fragile. They are the ones that get hurt easily. Anyone can ruffle their feelings. They treat others well and in turn expect the world to reciprocate. When that doesn't happen they are pained. They carry an expectation that humanity should appreciate their humility. It is a performance that needs recognition. In arrogance the ego is troubled and shaken. In humility the ego is caressed for later trouble.

Society and religion preaches you humility. It can be misleading. Instead of showing the balance, where an act is carried out independent of the prejudice, of arrogance and humility, it preaches one extreme over the other. It is because of this lop sided emphasis why we would find appeasement of wrong in the name of being good.

Humble people have dreams like any other. They don't flaunt their talents but secretly wish it is acknowledged. They want the limelight but expect to be prodded to take the stage. On the face it looks they are content with what they have but they are not. They don't realize that the very reason they try to be humble is to enhance their low self esteem. This humble behavior of theirs in the long run make them timid and shy. There is another set of people - celebrities, who are not shy of the limelight but would want to come across as humble. They like the tabloids to write about their humility in spite of their resounding success - another ego ride.

Both arrogance and humility are acts that stem from low self esteem. Humility can't be a cover up for arrogance. It is important that the reasons for ones low self esteem is addressed. Listen to your inner voice, your best friend, to know what action of yours would be a balanced act. A balanced act - free of arrogance and humility - could be a loud stern shout or a slap or a big grin or a simple glance or nothing. It is not the expression on the surface that matters but how complete one is within, from where that action sprung.

Why does one fail?

There could be any number of secondary factors but the primary factor that determines your success and failure is you.What your subconscious mind really wants decides the outcome and it overrides every hard slog and smart moves of yours.

One could consciously wish, pray and work for success but if you subconsciously carry a lingering doubt it would eventually play havoc. You could fall sick, run into unexpected situations, commit the unthinkable mistake or just about anything to make sure it is not favorable to you. The rules of destiny are simple. You always get what you want. Fortunately or unfortunately what you want subconsciously, that you had built over many many years from past actions and results, far outweighs what you want consciously ending in results that you may or not cherish.

The subconscious scar could be because of fear of failure, fear of success or strong desire for self deprecation and self pity or simple wishful thinking. Whatever the reason be it is enough to act as brakes to stop a success run. Though positive thinking may appear to alleviate self doubt in the short run, it only ends up colorfully clothing it. Self talks and loud expressions is not going to fool oneself for long. It would slowly begin to wither and drain you.

The simple solution is to take your legs of the brake instead of hard pressing the accelerator in the name of positive thinking. When you realize that you have created the brakes it would be lot easier to drop them. The momentum you would gain then would exceed your expectations and surpass many milestones.

Learning from Jealousy

Jealousy can be a sickening feeling. It is okay if it was just the reasons for jealousy without the disheartening feeling but it is like a double whammy where your friend has the cake and eats it too. All you can do is to gulp air down your throat seeing them eat it. Why does some of the successes and happiness of your friends cause jealousy while there are scores of successful celebrities faring much better than them don't? While successful celebrities can inspire why does the happiness of your friend cause heartburn? Jealousy is a peer group emotion. It is this group you use to evaluate yourself. You draw your strength, identity and most important your self-worth from this social setup. No one likes to look bad in their own eyes. 

Some feel jealous and crib. Some fight jealousy as a vice. Some suppress and party along. Just as much as one hides this jealousy the successful friend wants to flaunt it to be doubly assured that he indeed has done a worthy job. Many are disheartened if their social media posts don't get loads of likes. They want reassurance that they fit well. Both actions stem from the need to better their shaky self esteems. 

It is okay to be jealous. It is a natural human emotion that need not be seen as a negative energy to be slain. Shadow boxing would only tire you. It is important to understand what your heart is attempting to tell you. Listen to it as to why there is turbulence in the mind and what causes the low self esteem. Instead of feeling bad and fighting it you could use that to better understand yourself and work on your shortcomings. Befriending oneself is very essential. It holds the key to understand your real needs.

A content person who feels complete with oneself can never be jealous of another person. It is these doors of completeness that your heart wants to enter. Be complete and free yourself from clutches of jealousy.

Live Happy

You can be happy. The good news is it is easy and the bad news is one looks at the wrong place. There was once a man with his head bent crawling around the pole of a well lit streetlamp. A passerby wanting to help asks the man what you are looking for. The man said he was searching for his car keys that he had lost two streets away. The perplexed Samaritan asked why you are searching here if you lost the key somewhere else. That's because there are no lights there replied the man. This is what most of us do in search of happiness. To fill the void one seeks happiness in chasing wrong pursuits. They believe that more of something that they already have would make them happy for sure. If what they already have doesn't give them any satisfaction no more of the same is going to give them happiness. For example if a man has few thousand dollars in possession and he believes he can be happy with little more, when he gets that little more his wants grow so does the need for money but the constant worry for money remains. There are cases of the rich and the famous committing suicide anyways.

The legend tells when God created man he contemplated as to where to place his happiness. To make life interesting he wanted the key to abundance to be hid from man. He discounted hiding it in the distant galaxy or in the deep seas for he knew man would one day travel beyond the skies and explore the deepest of the oceans. He speculated stashing it in the material world around him but that didn't ring bell either. Burying it up in the heart of another person is futile as man is a social being and he would seek the company of others. So God finally thought that the best place to hide it is within the man himself. He was pretty sure that he would go about looking everywhere outside him but never find it until the day he starts to look within.

So how does one look within? What is to search within? It is not a tangible blob that is hidden inside that can be perceived by the five senses. It is beyond the senses but a genuine seeker would find it through meditation and contemplation. For a start one can calmly watch the subtle cycles of thoughts and emotions. It is thinking without awareness that causes the emotional roller-coasters. If one can realize that the one who is aware of the thought is different from the thought itself then glimpses of permanent bliss begin to permeate. Find yourself. Be Happy.