Accepting Oneself

We like to be seen important, witty, intelligent, smart etc,. If we are not naturally good at it we do things artificially to communicate such an impression. We do this as a way of protecting our self image or to create a sense of belonging. We build images of ourselves that makes us feel good. This is the facade that we want the world to see and associate us with. This is a projection which is not our true self. The more we wrap a cocoon out of fear and insecurity the more we fail to be oneself.

Be yourself. Stop the performance so you get accepted. There will always be people who would admire you for who you are. Let your interaction with this world be natural.

If you don't accept yourself as you are who else would. Drop the mask and be free.

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The Need for Attention

Every time we get a like on the profile pic or any post that we have uploaded on social media it makes us feel good. It is an indication that some action of ours has caught the attention of someone. The more the like count the greater is the joy. It gives us a sense of feeling that something we do is liked by others and so must be correct.

On the surface it looks perfectly fine but deep down the message is loud and clear that we need the world to constantly assure us and validate us. It is a sign that one is not sure about oneself. It is a shout from within on the lacking sense of self worth. It is a sign that one is not solid within.

The more we turn a blind eye the more we get hooked on to the false sense of completeness. We start doing many things to get the world to notice us. We want to know what our friends, neighbors and the world think about us. We become prisoners of thought. What we assume that others would think would determine our actions and not what is the most appropriate behavior.

Our self esteem then is like a weather bell, tossing the moods between excitement and depression. In such oscillation there is no way of finding your serene Self.

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Self Pity

As a child we all have cried for many reasons. We have cried in pain, hunger, fear and just about for many reasons. As kids we have learnt that crying gets attention, love and sympathy. These emotions comfort us and relieve nerves of insecurity.

As adults not much of our core changes. This active need for attention and validation continues. Not every time the world is going to stand next to you with a handkerchief in hand. One easy way to get attention and sympathy is from one's own.

Self pity paints us a saint in our eyes and wonder why the world is so devilish to us. We wonder why the world refuses to understand or reciprocate your goodness. The pain is ironically alluring.

For some the addiction of self pity is so strong that they refuse to let go. They attract more downfalls and sadness to crib about. If desire to be happy is no wishful thinking stop self pity.

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Being Good to others and Oneself

There are many good people who love to do good to others. They like to come across as friendly and fair. Their desire to be seen good could be immense that they don't mind sacrificing their happiness and well being. From an observer's point of view she is good to the other and bad to oneself.

Why would one do an act that is good to someone but end up bad to oneself? Shouldn't the need to be good to other applied to the self as well? Why is assertiveness so tough? Why is the balance missing?

The need to be good is different from being good. In being good there is balance. There would be natural assertiveness not planned assertiveness. There could be sacrifice but not to please or for appreciation.

In the need to be good one might bend more than required to please the other and in the process hurt themselves. They are hurt that their goodness is not recognized. They are infuriated when their goodness is taken for a ride.

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Negative Emotions

All the so called negative emotions like jealousy, anger, hatred, envy, sadistic pleasures and many other stem from insecurity. Insecurities are fears that has arisen out of the idea me vs rest of the world. A sense of separateness from the rest of the world. It is the idea of the ego. It is out of ignorance the human mind imagines so.

In order to survive one either fights or compromises. We pick fights with strangers and put up with bosses. If rubbed on the wrong side we show our displeasure to people who are meek and swallow pride if they are hulks and psychos.

So long the ignorance of Oneness exists the illusions of separation would exist. The drama would continue until one goes beyond the veils of Illusion or Maya. In Oneness you don't see the world as a threat to your existence. In Oneness there could be no ill feelings towards others. You would be a fountain of compassion. People would love to associate with you.

Compassion

Hate hates to forgive. Love loves to forgive. Compassion wasn't hurt to forgive.

Hate attempts to expand its boundaries through violence. Love attempts to expand its boundaries through appeasement. Compassion doesn't expand as it has no boundaries.

Hate attempts to remove insecurity by destruction. Love attempts to remove insecurity by inclusion. Compassion is beyond insecure delusions.

Hate has mission. Love has purpose. Compassion has no agenda.

Hate sees the other as enemy. Love sees the other as friend. Compassion sees the other as self.

Hate needs love to thrive. Love needs hate to serve. Compassion needs neither.

Hate connives. Love fantasizes. Compassion witnesses.

Hate hurts. Love soothes. Compassion heals.

Hate believes in doomsday. Love believes in judgement day. Compassion is about today.

Hate experiences sadness. Love experiences joy. Compassion experiences Bliss.

Hate resides in your mind. Love resides in your heart. Compassion resides in you.

Hate is out of arrogance. Love is out of ignorance. Compassion is out of awareness.